“You stole my heart, and you’re the one to blame…”
At this point of proceedings, I would just like to point out to everyone that Avril Lavigne is 26 years old. That is far, far too young to be having a mid-life crisis, wouldn’t you agree? Still, that’s more or less exactly what her new video feels like, as she attempts to reconnect with the tie-wearing faux-punk we grew to love (well, mostly hate – but there was some love!) back at the turn of the century. Needless to say, it doesn’t work.
There is some sort of weird pastiche going on here, in which Avril is attempting to reconcile her “trash the mall/steal boyfriend/have guys chase after her” self with her “sit at piano/look thoughtful/gaze off into the distance while sitting on bed” self. So you get Avril bouncing around a white room, spraying graffiti and playing guitar (PUNK RAWK 4 LYFZ) interspersed with footage of Avril walking around city streets in black and white and picking up pieces of a red glass heart (COLOUR IN THIS DARK DARK WORLD) and making people…you guessed it…smile!
I honestly have no freaking idea what Avril is going for here. All I know is that she’s pretty much embarrassing herself – this just feels so forced, so produced, so predictable. I’m sure this will smash the charts up or whatever, but for my money? Avril is still reeling from getting dumped by the Sum 41 dude.
“So what if I go out on a million dates?”
Hi hi hi hi hi hi! So, I’m back – been busy with a lot of different things, and also had my internet in repair so I was out of action for the better part of a week. Thankfully, I’m back now and generating content like a motherfucker. So, I have two things to apologise for: firstly, for being away. And secondly, for what I am about to show you.
Now, I honestly didn’t things could get much worse for Avril Lavigne. And considering her last album was responsible for such atrocities as Girlfriend and Hot, I really didn’t want them to. Yet here we are, in 2011, a decade or so after she first broke through with Complicated, putting to record THE worst thing she has ever been involved with – the song and the video, What the Hell.
Aside from the nauseating song itself, the video is a demonic exercise in shameless self-promotion. Product placement, for one, is usually the work of pure evil. Okay, so I let it slide in the Hold It Against Me video awhile back, but this is nothing short of ridiculous – especially the part where she runs into the clothing store and picks out her OWN FUCKING CLOTHES FROM HER LABEL! I mean, come on! The whole thing is just tacky and annoying, as she attempts to once again reinvent herself as a a pop icon and sex symbol. Newsflash, betch – ain’t gonna happen. Check it out, anyway – it’s like a bandaid. Just rip it off.